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Funny Answering Machine Greetings

To hear these greetings, you need the Real Audio Player 3.0 or greater.
You can download a free beta version of the player at the next link
Mission Impossible: This greeting starts off with the Mission Impossible theme and then the person talking says Hello caller, your mission, if you chose to except it, is to leave your name and number... Jack Nicholson: Jack sounds like he is in a bad mood or something but it is a pretty good greeting...
Simply Confusing: This greeting tells the caller to punch different buttons on the phone and bark like dog. President George Bush: Remember when President Bush said "No new taxes", well now he is saying "No new faxes" but I really think he means it
Elvis: The King himself. He sounds like a really destructive guy, esespecially when he smashes a tv. In the end, he offers the caller the possibility of picking out a Cadillac Help save poor Fluffy: Some of you out there might not think this is funny, but I think it is pretty good. When the caller gets this greeting, he will be told that there is a cat hooked up to a power source and if he choses to hang up without leaving a message the cat will be blown up.
The Afterlife Voice Mail System This is too cool greeting, just leave a message to somebody at heaven! Madonna This greeting sounds just a little like Madonna but it is pretty funny. So don't just stand there, let's get to it. Download this file; there's nothing to it... vouge! :^)
President Reagan: In this greeting, President Reagen complains about talking to a beep and then calls President Bush a ding a ling Phone-O-Matic: Wow!! This phone can do it all. This phone chops, slices, dices, and does many other things.
Spock He says there are no life forms t here but you can leave a message. Kinda boring but does sound a lot like Spock Quiz Show: This greeting says you have just won a new car but in order to actually win the car you have to state your name, number and the 50 states.
Rodney Dangerfield: This poor guy never gets any respect. He says he called suicide prevention and they tried to talk him into it. Make My Day: This is a good Clint Eastwood greeting. Clint warns that there is only Smith, Wesson, and himself...
Rodney Dangerfield: This poor guy never gets any respect. He says he called suicide prevention and they tried to talk him into it. Dial-N-Complain: The person caling will hear a greeting about how answering machines are cold and then the announcer will tell the caller that they are on the air.

This page is original from: James' Jungle of Free Stuff

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