Yo mamma so...

So Old...

• Yo mamma so old she has Jesus' beeper number!
• Yo mamma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch'
• Yo mamma so old I told her to act her own age, and the b**ch died.
• Yo mamma so old her social security number is 1!
• Yo mamma so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
• Yo mamma so old she owes Jesus 3 bucks!
• Yo mamma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.
• Yo mamma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
• Yo mamma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
• Yo mamma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.
• Yo mamma so old she's blind from the big bang
• Yo mamma so old even God calls her mother!

So Stupid...

• Yo mamma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
• Yo mamma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
• Yo mamma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
• Yo mamma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
• Yo mamma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
• Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
• Yo mama so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
• Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
• Yo mamma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
• Yo mama so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
• Yo mama so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
• Yo mama so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?", she marked, "M, F and sometimes Wednesday too."
• Yo mamma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
• Yo mamma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
• Yo mamma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
• Yo mamma so stupid she bought a video camera to record cable TV shows at home.
• Yo mamma so stupid that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
• Yo mamma so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
• Yo mamma so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
• Yo mamma so stupid she thought gangrene was another golf course
• Yo mamma so stupid she couldn't read an audio book
• Yo mamma so stupid it take her a month to get rid of the 7 day itch.
• Yo mamma so stupid she thought the Nazis were saying "Hi! Hitler"
• Yo mamma so stupid it take her a day to cook a 3 minute egg
• Yo mamma so stupid She went to Disney world and saw a sign that said "Disney world Left" so she went home.
• Yo mamma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said "guess" so she said Levi's
• Yo mamma so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitimate" because she couldn't read
• Yo mamma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!

So Nasty...

• Yo mamma so nasty when she goes to a hair salon, she told the stylist to cut her hair and she opened up her shirt
• Yo mamma so nasty She gotta put ice down her drawers to keep the crabs fresh!
• Yo mamma so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
• Yo mamma so nasty she brings crabs to the beach
• Yo mamma so nasty she made right guard turn left.
• Yo mamma so nasty she has to creep up on bath water.
• Yo mamma so nasty that her sh*t is glad to escape.
• Yo mamma so nasty Ozzie Ozbourne refused to bite her head off
• Yo mamma so nasty I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection.
• Yo mamma so nasty lice consider her a great vacation place
• Yo mamma so nasty she was declared quarantine since before she was born
• Yo mamma so nasty she joined the four horseman: war, death, famine, disease and Yo mamma
• Yo mamma so nasty she went swimming and now we have the dead sea
• Yo mamma so nasty skunks run from her

So Ugly...

• Yo mamma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
• Yo mamma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras
• Yo mamma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
• Yo mamma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
• Yo mamma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
• Yo mamma so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
• Yo mamma so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
• Yo mamma so ugly she made an onion cry.
• Yo mamma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.
• Yo mamma so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours... for a quote
• Yo mamma so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
• Yo mamma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!
• Yo mamma so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!
• Yo mamma so ugly people go as her for Halloween.
• Yo mamma so ugly she scares the roaches away.
• Yo mamma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
• Yo mamma so ugly she is very successful at her job: Being a scarecrow
• Yo mamma so ugly your dad's breath smells like shit because he would rather kiss her ass.

Tomado de: http://www.spacestar.net/users/shiznitt/letterman.htm